Forgiveness

Doug writes:

Today’s Gospel reading was hard to take (Matthew 18.21-35). A king with slaves meting out terrible consequences for one of them who mistreats a fellow slave. It isn’t one of the best-known parables, and that is understandable since it is pretty unpleasant. The point of the parable is to emphasise the need for forgiveness, and we took the point from a story designed to shock its hearers, to make them indignant, to engage their sense of outrage and desire to see justice done. It is not unlike some of the Nordic noir series which represent some extreme situations before justice is finally done. Perhaps we don’t like the darker side of human nature brought to our attention so dramatically – or maybe we do find it engaging. Certainly there are many things in society today which cannot be ignored. Like the legacy of slavery and the prevalence of violence. And the need for judgement.

Jesus is portrayed responding to a question about how often we should forgive another who sins against us. He says that the suggestion of seven times is not the right way, but rather broadens it out to seventy seven times. By that time you would have lost count anyway! So be forgiving. To fail in forgiveness is to create barriers and to perpetuate your own unhappiness as well as that of others. And it is not Christ’s way, for he is the one who says, as he is crucified, “Father forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing”. Forgiveness is at the heart of the Gospel, and as God’s people we need to recognize that we are forgiven so much that we can live in the light of God’s forgiveness and offer it to others.

There are, of course, some situations which cannot simply be forgiven, where someone’s life is impaired or ruined physically or psychologically and we know that this can happen in families, churches and throughout society. We should report those who abuse others. Only then can we begin to consider how to move on and hopefully forgive. Yet much of daily life that needs to be forgiven is relatively mundane but very significant. Selfishness, bullheadedness, gossip, letting people down, failing to maintain social distance, failing to assist or support, wastefulness, intolerance: it all builds up and we share in the general “falling short” that mars our relationships and our world. This evening’s programme by Sir David Attenborough will look at the consequences of our combined carelessness and greed in wiping out many species and polluting the planet. Like some Nordic noir, or a dramatization of Jesus’ parable about blatant greed and avarice, I am not sure I can bear to watch though I think I need to.

The Wedding Service (when will we have one of those again?) contains a prayer asking that, for the couple, may “forgiveness heal injury”. It’s not a sentimental prayer, it recognizes that even in the most loving relationships we have the capacity to hurt one another. Yet there is healing, when we turn to God, when we seek his forgiveness for our failures and follies, then we return to the Divine perspective and realise afresh that we who are forgiven by the Lord, at the cost of the sacrifice of his Son, can offer newness and forgiveness to others. We who are forgiven are rightly challenged to be forgiving people, we who are loved can learn more of what it is to live in the love of God in company with all our brothers and sisters.